We devise a local--global solver dedicated to the simulation of Discrete Elastic Rods (DER) with Coulomb friction that can fully leverage the massively parallel compute capabilities of moderns GPUs. We verify that our simulator can reproduce analytical results on recently published cantilever, bend--twist, and stick--slip experiments, while drastically decreasing iteration times for high-resolution hair simulations. Being able to handle contacting assemblies of several thousand elastic rods in real-time, our fast solver paves the ways for new workflows such as interactive physics-based editing of digital grooms.